A promise I can't keep

We were busy today. I had a lot to do and the kids were coming with me because Jen was working. Truth be told, I usually take the kids with me anyway, but they had to come today, there was no way out. I have been wrestling with this printer (an issue that is finally resolved) and I had to return it today and wrestle with a new one. The round trip for this whole ordeal was about three hours... a long time to be in a car to be sure.

I told the kids that if they were good in the store, I would take them to Wooberry afterward. So, we went into Best buy (fifty dollars cheaper for the same printer btw than Staples) and I asked a lot of questions to a fairly knowledgable sales person. About mid way through, the kids started building up into this wrestling match. Playful, good natured, but definitely not well behaved. This culminated in them both falling on the floor as Nora completely shoved Henry into the sales guy who politely laughed as I growled at them to stop.

So, now, dilemma: Two kids, who, for the most part were very well behaved and were very patient with me and my schedule today, that violated the one set rule that I gave them regarding their reward. I am not one of those parents that bends all the time. I understand boundaries and our need for them (I do teach 8th grade after all). So, no Wooberry. The problem is this, I want to take them there, not because I especially want to go there, but because I know they want to got there. I want to do good things for them.

Grace

is a very hard thing to incorporate into parenting, and yet it is so incredibly vital. Not wishy washy parenting, but the notion that Love trumps Justice. This is a very big thing to me. It is my central belief in God. It is how I believe God looks toward me, to everyone for that matter. He loves us above all the things we do. How does that translate into parenting? It's a hard thing.

I want them to know how to find success in this world. I want them to understand how the rules work and to see themselves as successful in fulfilling the expectations set before them. And yet, I want them to know that if they fail that I am not going to stomp them into the ground. That I will still extend every good thing I can toward them.

This is the opposite of my career. I am so strict regarding late work... no makeups, no extra credit, no excuses. I want my students to know the parameters of what is good practice and what isn't. I want them to be the most successful students at their high school/colleges. I do that by enforcing the rules and helping them to meet them. So, no Wooberry.

But, I have this very deep belief, a philosophy really, that love is supreme and that every good thing I have stands directly opposed to what I deserve. Not that I am the worst guy in the world, just that, the really big things, like love, faith, hope, all of the things that people can't attain through good behavior, all of what I would consider to be the most important things, all of those things were just given to me. So yes Wooberry.

On the trip back from the store, I explained to Nora and Henry, that because of their behavior, they didn't deserve to go to Wooberry. (tears, moaning wailing) and that because I love them, I am taking them anyway. This is the best way that I can describe the love that I believe is directed toward me by God. Just given, just received, in bewilderment and with a faint feeling that either the guy giving it to me doesn't exactly understand the rules, or that I am not really fully understanding what those rules are, or in fact, that there is a set of other rules that somehow supersede the rules that I generally live by.

I liken this to C. S. Lewis' deep magic in the chronicles of Narnia... deep, big, powerful rules that form the foundation of everything and that are tragically and almost always ignored.

They are both asleep now and I am sure, are completely ignorant of the philosophical wrestling match I a had today regarding their spiritual life. I do know, however, that they enjoyed their frozen yogurts.

Good night kids, sleep well.
db

Early...

Henry woke up at 4:45 this morning. He came into our bedroom to announce that he was up. I went over and tried to fall back asleep in Nora's abandoned bed (she sleeps in Henry's room). Five minutes later Henry was next to me, arm on my back, "Hey Dad." He had no idea how early it was. So, I got up with him. I decided that, if we were going to be up that early, we might as well do something awesome with it, so we went and climbed Mt. Wachusett.  We got there at about 6:30. Its the second time that we have climbed it this summer vaca. I am going to try to climb it at least once a week all summer long. Last week, we climbed an old fire road, Henry and I, and I messed up the map, so the trail didn't take us all the way to the summit. This time I chose the shortest route up, The Mountain House Trail. Well, it was a bit more difficult for me than I anticipated. I did only need to take a break twice though, and the thing is pretty much up the whole way. The shortest route up, by definition, would be the steepest as well. The trail was wooded almost to the top. Henry saw this little snail on the way... cute little guy.

Henry loved it. No problem for him at all. Chaucer seemed to like it quite a bit as well. There is something special about getting to the top of something. I used to climb Monadnock quite a bit when I was younger, and there really isn't much like topping a mountain. There was a beautiful breeze and the view is great. They are building a new tower at the top.

Later, after Jenny went to work, I took the kids to Old Sturbridge Village. There isn't a lot of financial reward for being a teacher, getting into museums for free is one of those rewards. Unfortunately, they changed their policy slightly, and now I only get in for half off. Also, the kids are now old enough to have to pay for their way in as well. There was a time, when all three of us would walk the dusty streets of the OSV for free.

Both kids love to go there. They have been there quite a few times, but, I think the freedom of being able to explore whatever house they want really entices them. They had a great time. So did I. Here are some pics...

wild roses

I hiked with Henry this morning. For some unexplainable reason, the mosquitos left us alone and we were just able to enjoy the walk. We sat for a long time, feet hanging over the river, and talked about nature and this and that. I wonder sometimes if he will remember these things when he is older. I don't remember a whole lot from when I was his age. I hope he does. It is so special to me to just be able to hear him and just be next to him.

The milkweed is blooming. When it does, the fields are filled with the truly heady fragrance. I love it. I could smell it right when we started walking... sweet and thick. It was a good day to talk with
Henry about the nature of things, and to hear him think things through.

a grass pathway through the woods

This morning we took the kids on a mini-hike through the woods. Actually, we took Jenny to our "secret place" of a few posts ago. Chaucer, true to form, dove into the river and got way too smelly. Nora started narrating and describing all of the fallen down trees, odd holes in the ground, and fauna sprouting from the forest floor. We crossed the little make-shift bridge over the river, jumping up and down on the sheet metal tossed across the two trees bridging the river.

Next to the river, there was a path that shot off parallel to the river... not the typical fishing guy's path though. It looked more like a mini road that had become over grown with grass. We followed it a while and finally came across a sign designating it as the midstate trial. It was really pretty beautiful.

I want to do a lot of hiking this summer. I was on the trustees of reservations website looking at a list of places that they own. Some of them look so tempting. Pastures and bear dens and huge granite cliffs leading to waterfalls. I have always loved exploring some place new. I think that I will be hitting a few of these places this year. If any of you want to come along (given that I actually know who you are..... and that I like who you are :) ) just Facebook me a message and come along.

db

The Vet's

We took our cats Ramses and Saul to the Vets for their annual check up and shots today. Henry and Nora love it when we go. They both get so paternal about the situation. Our cats, actually all of our pets, are amazingly gentle and kind. No scratching or biting or barking or anything really, other than licking. The cats do not like to be in the carrier however. They moan and cry the whole eight minutes to the vet in the center of town, Henry and Nora comforting them and laughing the whole time.

Henry loves to read about the ticks in the pamphlets in the waiting room. He actually knows a bit about them all. He impressed the vet assistant behind the counter when he was counting off the types of ticks he knows about... "lone star tick"? Really Henry?

When we got home, both he and Nora cornered Chaucer (his perpetually lying down form didn't mind trust me) and were pretending to be Veterinarians. Nora had her "doctor" kit out and was giving him shot after shot and Henry was taking his blood pressure. I went to take a picture and Henry bolted. I guess big boys don't give doggies blood pressure readings.

We have had such a good run with pets. Growing up, my parents were kind of hit and miss with good natured pets. Their cat now is nice enough, but over weight and moody (mean kind of moody) :) He doesn't seek to harm you... but don't cross him (or rub his belly). It makes no sense at all, but I have always attributed welcoming, warm pets, with their owners personalities. If a woman had a loving, happy dog, I always assumed that she was a loving, happy woman. I know its not true, but I still have that in my head for some reason.

All of our pets have been sweethearts.  ;)

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Waves of summer

Summer comes in waves. I let go, little by little and a couple weeks in I feel lighter and I can start to think more clearly, relax more fully. I am starting to feel the school year drop off me a bit. My morning walks have been a bit sporadic due to the super hot weather. I haven't even planted my garden yet... don't worry, I have short season crops. I am sitting here at 10:00 listening to Bon Iver and typing a post from a couple of days ago.

That morning I walked by myself, slowly through these big fields. It was the morning after the heat broke and the rains came. This little spider was grabbing a drop of water. I don't know what he was doing with it... I imagine possibly removing it. I am going to start on my summer plans this week... building front and back steps that actually look like something better than the "construction" steps that have been on our house for the past few years. I am going to call a few landscapers and ask them about clearing the land next to me, and about replanting and leveling our front, and possibly back yards. I am going to repaint the upstairs bathroom. I might go ahead and build a shed off to the left of our driveway.  It's all like this little spider, moving things, making things better. Building. I am no construction guy. I truly have very little idea about how to do any thing like this. But I am going to try on my own, like my Dad did/does. I guess the fact that he builds everything himself is one of two chief motivations for trying to do these things myself... the other being money of course.

Still, this is my house, and I wanted these challenges.

db

Hamburgers Away

Today we went to my Mom's for a hamburger cook off. There were, I would say about thirty people there and about seven competing hamburgers. My Aunt Barbara ended up winning with her Bison Burger and homemade buns.  It was a really nice day. The weather helped and the company was great. It pretty much consisted of my extended family.... the Christmas crowd. I tried this recipe by Alton Brown... the burger of the Gods. Serious recipe, I had to grind my own hamburg! crazy. I am going to post a bunch of pictures from it. Just a nice summer day.

we eat with our hands....

It was so hot today. I wanted to go out and do things... but no way. So here is a nice picture of ..... supper.

Henry still shuns utensils... Does this ever end?? His tastes as an eater are amazing. He loves spicy food and ethnic food, really anything that isn't goopey. He hates scrambled eggs and avocado, things like that. I love what Henry eats. He is unafraid of new things and tends towards fresh, crisp, good-for-you things. But, he still eats with his hands too much..... wait a minute..... That's probably why he doesn't like goopey food, it sucks to get it all over your hands! Yes! See, writing is a perfect way to work through your thoughts!

So, tonight I decided to go ahead and make something Henry could get his hands into, a fact that he actually, outwardly celebrated. I made grilled tandoori chicken (here is the link to the recipe. I used one from that Arti girl on Food Network). Its a great recipe as long as you have a well stocked spice drawer! ( I do, even the cardamom pods!!) I grilled a bunch of other things on skewers right along side it: onions, mushrooms, red and yellow peppers, grape tomatoes, dried apricots, and dates. Then I threw some feta, olives and stacked some cucumbers and mixed greens along the side, ripped up some pita bread and made some couscous. It's actually the sauce that pulled the whole thing together, so if you make it, don't skip that step.

I am so looking forward to the cool down tonight. The windows are open. The fans are on. The breeze is sweeping through. Ahhh... now if I weren't being forced to watch "Say Yes to the Dress." Things might just be perfect. :)

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Worcester Art Museum

Today was busy, probably too busy. It was hot so we decided to try to do things that were inside somewhere with AC. I was up for going off to Boston, but I had band practice at 7:00, so we tooled around worcester. Without making things longer than necessary, we decided to go to the art museum, then to Wooberry and then off to see Madagascar three.

I tried for "moody" shots at the museum. I am happy with a couple of them. I love the first one with Henry and Nora on the bench. I also kinda love the one that I am official entitling "Nora Reclining."

Both Henry and Nora seemed to really like the art museum. Nora's favorite part was one of the pieces that let you use a magnifying glass to look at coins. Henry didn't know exactly what to make of the nude pieces, a perfect opportunity to start to explain nudity in art and beauty to him... not really sure he got it though... lol.

Here are the pics.

Here is one of my favorite pieces... ;)

Here's one for Wooberry just for the heck of it.... original, chocolate covered ginger, and orange boba YEAH!!

small things

This morning, before it got too hot, Jonathan and Emily came over to walk with Chaucer, Henry and me. This was the first time that I have had anyone that wasn't directly in my family walk with me. I felt this odd urge to give some sort of tour of the places that I have found. Fortunately, Emily and Jonathan are used to me and my oddities and went right along with me. I love having perfectly quirky and understanding friends.

On the way in I saw this tiny bird perched at the top of a dead tree. I snapped a picture, zoomed in, and it turned out to be a tiny little hummingbird perched majestically at the top of the canopy.

On the way back to the car, we found these tiny, baby frogs hopping all along the sandy road. I love these little guys. They're so delicate and sweet. I am titling this picture, "The Hands of God" which is a subtle compliment to Jonathan whose hands these are.

Jelly and Celibacy

We ran out of jelly today, and so it is time for our annual pilgrimage. I, deep down, do love to buy locally grown. I love to know exactly who it is that I am supporting. St. Joseph's Abbey in Spencer is one of those places that you can't help but want to support. I mean come on, a bunch of lonely old guys making canned goods? Yes, you can have my money. We go there every so often and buy a box of 12 various jellies. The kids love to go in and pick out what they want. They're really good, and, plus, I kind of have a thing for monks. 

St, Joseph's abbey is truly a beautiful place. The monks bought 2300 acres of land in 1950 and landscaped much of it into little secretive corners tucked away around the monastery. The place exudes peace. Most it is off-limit to non-monks... a fact that absolutely kills me. These big red signs and gates make no doubt of where you are allowed and not. There are about 80 monks who live there. They are part of the Cistercian Order of Strict Observance. They really do make their own jelly there. In fact, the trappists only make jelly there. In fact... For a while, only two monks were responsible for making all of the jelly that came out of the place. The profits from their jelly-making brings in about half of the budget. 

I actually thought about interviewing the monk at the counter in their little store, but when I walked in it was a layperson, big let down. Still, I have been thinking of boldly announcing that I am writing a blog and asking if they wouldn't mind answering a few questions (and letting me into all of the secret, hidden away aspects of their monastery with full permission to take pictures and sneak around where ever I want). 

The inside of the chapel is so beautiful: old, gothic, full of artifacts, and some very smart monk decided to make all of the stained glass windows blue. It's like walking into midnight (sigh). If things were different I would be a monk..... I really would. 

The kids and I, on our second adventure :) walked the grounds and tried to find all of the little statues and mysterious corners of the grounds available to us. We found a tree that had definitely been struck by lightning (see pic) and a few other great places. When we went in the chapel, I told the kids that they had to be silent out of respect for the monks, which they were, and I think Nora took me very seriously. At one point, an monk emerged from a side door near us and Nora clung to me like there was no tomorrow. We waved and he waved back, and Nora relaxed. 

"Relaxed" is about THE word that I would choose to describe that place.... a sanctuary. Sometime, I am going to go for a service.... I heard they actually chant.... (sigh).

db

Adventure: day 1

Last year I tried to cheer Henry up, because he was sad that school was ending, by telling him that we would go on tons of adventures. The first day of vacation, I took both kids to try to catch some crayfish. Well, this year, I guess that Henry has decided it would be a tradition. So, off we went. We actually caught one last year, but this year was less successful. We did catch a water strider and we saw a few fish. We found a lunar moth wing abandoned on the said of the road.

The nice thing was that both kids got right in the river and waded around. The water was nice and cold at first, and Nora thought that it was a bit slimy... but aren't adventures supposed to be cold and slimy? I also took a few pictures on my walk with Chauc this morning. I think that this one, with the road and the  black bird might be my favorite picture that I have taken this year.

Henry just asked me what adventure we are going to have tomorrow. We might be up for a very adventurous summer :)

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