Spencer Fair

There are many reasons that I love living in a small town. The Spencer Fair falls nicely into several of these reasonings. I have gone every year for a long time now. I even entered and won one of the photography contests a long long time ago. It is small and hokey and.... in my mind, just about perfect. We stayed for part of the "hypnotist" show. I still don't know if this is for real or a complete rip off.... Someone really needs to enlighten me here. Jenny laughed so hard at one of the guys hamming it up on stage, completely enraptured by the "bird" sitting on his finger.
There were elephant rides and pig races, a crash up derby and acrobats, three kids performing bike tricks and cheap and questionable carnival rides.... perfect. We ate there from the horn-a-plenty of our choice of deep-fried meats and ...well... really anything you can imagine. The kids loved it. Jenny loved it. A perfect day.

Botanists

Henry, Nora and I went out to collect as many types of flowers as we could today. I told them they were both botanists and we needed to go and find samples. I have a project in mind that calls for pressed flowers and plants. So we took a huge plastic case and found as many different types of flowers as we could. Goldenrod, daisies, thistles and flowers that we made up names for... popcorn flowers and carnivorous russian fly traps (thanks Henry).

The town had just mowed the fields in the park so we got to walk along freshly mowed fields (my favorite smell in the world) and look for beetles and snakes and were surrounded by dragonflies.

You saw me dancing alone....

This picture was complete moonlight taken past 9:00 at night. Very bright moon.

Its a blue moon. I noticed that there would be a second full moon in August a couple months ago and marked it on my calendar. I figured we could hit one of them and go out for an Owl Walk.

When Henry was tiny, before Nora was born, we went to Wachusett Meadow in Princeton for a mid-winter reading of Owl Moon and a moonlit owl walk. I loved it. Henry was barely talking. It was cold and we had to bundle him up nice and tight. After the woman was through reading, she passed around an owl wing and a claw, then we went out. We didn't go far. It really was cold. But as we were walking, Henry pulled on my pantleg to get my attention. He pointed to the shadows the moon was casting of us and told me how his was so small and mine was so big. He was three, he could barely talk and I had to really listen to make out what he was trying to say, but it was in reference to the story we had just heard.

          "Our feet crunched
            over the crisp snow
            and little gray footprints
            followed us.
            Pa made long shadows,
            but mine was short and round.
            I had to run after him
            every now and then
            to keep up,
            and my short, round shadow
            bumped after me."

I don't know what it was that hit me so deeply, but I will never forget it. The story is wonderfully written and speaks of a deep, quiet relationship of a son and father. To have him reference it and speak of our shadows within the context took me by surprise.

We went out tonight, to find owls. Henry and Nora and I. We had to wait until the moon was bright enough, which was past 9:00. We drove out to Rutland State Park. We took a flashlight and my camera. I parked the car in a little turn off by the river and we got out. The moon was so bright that I didn't need the flashlight, we never even turned it on. I have seen bears here before: In the morning before the sun comes up, half hidden in the fog. I would be lying if I didn't say that I had that in the back of my head. We walked for about a mile or so, next to the fields that border the river. Even though the moon was plenty bright enough to see everything by, Nora still clung to me. She held my hand the whole time, and in the shadowed parts of the road, where the trees blocked the moon, she pushed harder into my side. Henry forged ahead. There were plenty of crickets to be heard, but no owls. So, by a big rock at the end of a long stretch of pasture, I put my hand to my mouth and did the best owl call I could (I'm not an expert ;) ) and I'll be dammed if an owl didn't call back to me. Crazy. Henry was so excited. To be honest, I was too. I tried a few more times, and both Henry and Nora did as well, but that was the only time it called back. It was enough for me. We walked back to the car feeling like we had reached out and been heard.

db

walking stick

This morning, when I came home from my walk this huge walking stick was clinging to the wheel hub of Jenny's car. I picked him up and took him inside to show Henry. Of course he, and everyone else for that matter, was still sleeping. The walking stick had to be at least four or five inches long. So amazing. I woke Henry up and showed it to him while he was still in his bed. I know, freaky bug in house while sleeping, but he loved it, like I knew he would. The thing was surprisingly fast. Jenny woke up and saw it... no screams... no get it out of heres... just a "wow, neat" Because that's the way we do things in our house.

After a little bit I put it out on the witch hazel tree in our front yard and snapped this picture.... Nora, true to form, slept through it all.

routine

School is fully started. There can be no doubt about it. I am trying to force myself to set strong, healthy routines. I am not one of those people who decides something and then it automatically becomes part of the bedrock of my life. I get..... distracted. I have been this way my whole life. I am happy looking out of the window instead of doing my work. In fact, I have developed strategies in my life to work within this weakness. During meetings (my arch-nemesis) I allow myself to draw. My meeting notes end up looking like a sketchbook, but my mind stays sharp and focused on what is being said. I learned this in college. My best thinking happens when I am slightly distracted... driving, in the shower, while talking to other people. When I get overloaded with correcting, my best option is the comfy chairs in Barnes and Nobles. People shuffling by, music that I am not in control of, people looking at me occasionally with slightly antagonistic wonder on their faces as a plop my huge pile of papers onto the table in front of me and pick through them one by one. This is perfect. In the down time, I rely on routine to get me through. I will not even brush my teeth unless its part of the canon, the underlying laws of my day. It takes a while, but once something is pounded into place, it stays..... I do brush my teeth. I wanted to get walking chaucer and bike riding to and from school to be part of that law. I have pretty much succeeded with Chauc, not so much with the bike though.

Here is a list of what I would like to happen everyday...

1. Wake half an hour before sunrise.
2. Shower etc (includes brushing teeth...)  floss!!
3. Drive Chaucer to Rutland State Park and hike with him for about an hour or so.
4. Eat a light breakfast (like a banana) and a take a multi vitamin.
5. Bike to school. This takes between half an hour and forty-five minutes. (this also takes prep... like
    clothes laid out the night before...
6. Get to school at no later than 7:30
7. Prep for class and work all day
8. Bring a piece of fruit for lunch.
9. Stay at school and correct and prep long enough to get home at 3:55. (kids come home at 4:00)
10. Come home and don't eat anything but a very small snack until supper (this ones tough)
11. Sit with Henry and Nora as they work through their homework and correct while they are working.
12. If Jenny is home, eat what she has cooked for supper and help her clean. If she isn't, prepare supper
      and clean up afterward (dishes included)
13. Watch some TV...
14. Have between half an hour and an hour of quiet (reading) time in our house before the kids go to  
      bed.
14. Get the kids to bed between 7:30 and 8:00
15. Prepare for tomorrows class
16. Write in this blog
17. brush teeth etc.
18. Go to bed between 9:30 and 10:00

There you have it: My schedule.
In all honesty, I have most of it down. The only things that sometimes don't happen are numbers: 5, 10, sometimes 14, and sometimes 18. Also, flossing everyday is somehow avoiding me. Its the darn floss.... it disappears in this house! I never know where the thing is hiding.
There is some derivation, like somedays Nora has dance, and one day a week we get together with our friends, also, there is Band Practice on Thursdays. So... you know... life. But this is more or less the frameworks of my day.
Now, when things don't go according to plan.... well... .working through that is a whole different entry.

Btw.... this morning was completely beautiful in RSP... love this last picture...

psalm

As the river fog floods the golden rod
     I will take it with me

The catbird, grey against grey, always at my back
     I will take it with me

The nasal grunts of beavers filter through the arrowroot leaves
     I will take it with me

The starlight sun bursts between the branches of the swamp maples
     I will take it with me

The crickets' song crowds the morning mists
     I will take it with me

Oh god... they're growing....

Both Nora and Henry went to school today........They are both school age......... (panic). I literally could not stop thinking about Nora all day. I would go for a little bit and then get this stomachy, somethings-wrong feeling. I just didn't want her to cry, and she didn't. She had a great day. Jenny followed her to school in the car and snapped a couple of pictures/videos of her at school. She sat with our neighbor down the street who is the same age. They became quick friends.

Henry's day wasn't so nice. His actual day went pretty well, except for getting lost and winding up in a fourth grade class for a few minutes. His morning wasn't too great though. Two busses came to pick him up. Jen had to work out which bus was the correct one and in the confusion (not a good thing for Henry's mind) Chaucer got out and was running all around the busses. Henry was concerned that he would be hit by one (he actually just told me that he was scared for him as I was putting him to bed). Also, it was completely raining and, well, just a chaotic first morning. He did say he liked his teacher though, when he came home, forty five minutes late............  Henry's teacher called to check in on how he was doing after his "wandering away." I guess they had to hunt him down... It's not so bad, I know. But he's mine, with all of his strengths (which are many) and weaknesses, and it seems so redundant to let someone else try to know all of this about him and know how to treat him the right way. I know that Henry is also growing from the new relationships, and that's comforting. I just sometimes wish I could just focus on my two kids and let the rest of the world do what it wants to.

db